Pretending....

There is value in pretending.  Children already know this.  We adults think it is childish to pretend and so we discredit its power.  The other week the kids and I read about the Sun King, Louis XIV of France and how he attributed the success of his leadership to being a divinely appointed king, one due all manner of honor and privileges.  He pretended to be all worthy, exemplary in every way.  He made the little things in his daily life into great ceremonies, even giving individuals the "great privilege" of emptying his chamber pots.  The nobles of France were swept into his act, the theater of his kingship. And he served on the throne for many years.
 In medical school, they tell you to "pretend" that you know what you are doing as you enter the room with a patient those early years of practicing.  They explain that entering that room with clumsy manners and sweaty insecurity is actually harmful to the patient.  It creates anxiety for them instead of allowing them to be given the art of medicine, the reassurance of a doctor's presence.  And they are right.  The patient wants to believe that just the presence of the doctor is the beginning of a helpful path of healing.  I remember how hard this idea was for me to "pretend" prior to my clinical experiences.  Would I be lying to my patients?  And yet, when I stepped into the room, I found how much it seemed helpful.  I put aside my own self, full of insecurities and questions, and stepped into a role, a role in which I would better serve others.
I think that part of being a good parent is pretending.  Pretending that you do know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, what you are doing when you tell them that it is important to obey and go to bed and stay there.  Pretending that you are most definitely worthy of honor and respect when you really feel that you make a thousand mistakes a day.  They are young.  As they are trying to understand the big-ness of this full-sensory adventure ride of a world, they need to know there is a steady guide, a calm hand at the stern of the ship.  One day there will be nuance and multi-layers of color to all of this, but for now it is simple.  No, as a five year old, you will not be allowed to decide  what you should eat or with whom you should play.  We know what we are doing up here in the cockpit.  Sit back and enjoy the ride.  And hopefully this "pretending" will give them grace to sit back and enjoy the much greater adventure of life; being a small part of God's big kingdom plan when His ways are much higher than your ways.